A day in the life of...

The young have something no one else has or ever will have. Time.

It's true. We are smart, beautiful and...alcoholic.

Monday, October 15, 2012

"This is not a game I play discreetly"

J has a new theory about men and their place in the universe and her bed. That would be the 3 classic types, type A, type B and type AB. Note that this has nothing to do with either A or B, although A is probably conveniently a type A and B a type B. But they're girls. So this doesn't apply.

Type A guys are the typical alpha males. Good-looking, successful and arrogant. Comes with the territory. They're the player types, who'll pick up any girl who strikes their fancy and never call them again. Just because they can. The type you sleep with and they'll pretend they don't recognise you the next time you run into them at the bar. The type that give J the shits because, even though she's a typical type A herself, no one like those you can smell the narcissism rolling off. Plus, they're usually bad in bed because they're selfish or think they're in a porno. Exception for V on that one.

Type B guys are at the opposite end of the spectrum. Shy dudes and losers who are insecure and desperate. Not only do they call, but they'll send 5 unanswered text messaged. They don't seem to take the hint that maybe, just maybe, you're not that into them. Always asking you out after a one-night-stand and how did they get your number anyway? Type B guys are desperate for a girlfriend although most girls don't want to be with a guy who cries in public so they're often not that successful. They make good, if a little wimpy, husbands and fathers. They are reliable and trustworthy. But where's the fun in that? Hey though, they make good friends

Then there's the type AB guys, the ones who fall somewhere in the middle. The ones J is frequently on the lookout for but always seem rarer than the other two. These are the guys who'll give you a 'hey how's it going' if you see them after you have sex. They don't call, but they don't ignore you either. They're into sex and a good time but they will stop and chat if they see you sober. Or running for the last train. Whatever. Perfect fuck buddy material. And boyfriend material really, because they they are like type A without the arrogance, or type B without the patheticness. Sadly, these guys are becoming harder and harder to find.