A day in the life of...

The young have something no one else has or ever will have. Time.

It's true. We are smart, beautiful and...alcoholic.

Monday, January 30, 2012

"We are the youth gone wild"

It's summer. it's time for beer and hell-raising. In that order.

It's been a hell of a summer so far. At least the weather has been hot, unlike in previous 'summers'. Days have been spent lying on the beach with ice-cold beer and cheap cigarettes followed by pub dinners with cold but nasty white wine. You just can't drink red in the weather. Unless it's in sangria. And yeah, we will pay 50 bucks for a jug of sangria if it's good. That's just the way things are done.

Poor M is desperately missing E, who is on a 6-month working trip. The phone calls and Skype dates are no substitute for actually seeing someone, and he's been gone less than a month. M is suddenly starting to wonder if she can handle long distance. E has gotten less jealous now that he's finally left though and is acting like he actually trusts M to be herself and be a good girlfriend. The only problem may be that with trust comes responsibility and M isn't sure she can handle that. It was so much easier when E was being a jackass and acting like he expected her to cheat; M behaved well because she was proving him wrong. Now it's just that much harder to withstand temptation. But M's a good girl. We have faith.

Of course, not all of us are good girls...Dinner date has been so unbelievably nice to A the entire time he's known her that of course she was going to take advantage. He took her out for dinner and bought her drinks and made her breakfast in bed...she took him for a ride. One Saturday night he asked her what she was up to. Because she didn't want to see him, A lied and told him she was spending the night at home. Really, his first mistake was believing A would spend a Saturday night at home. So what if you have to work the next morning? A bucket of KFC and you'll be right. A didn't go to the place she normally bumps into dinner date but instead went out to a backpacker joint to flirt with cute English boys. She made out with one who invited her home but she ended up shucking him to head back to the bar, only to get tapped on the shoulder by a very pissed off dinner date who'd obviously seen the whole thing. A basically laughed in his face while he called her a slutty liar and stormed off. She felt a bit bad the next morning (but maybe that was from the strawberry ice-cream cocktails) and sent him an apologetic text which resulted in him leaving a teary voicemail hoping they can get back together. A didn't even realise they were together. She promptly deleted the message and continuted her walk of shame home from the English boy's flat.

J? She's just generally making a nuisance of herself. For her, going out for one drink will always involve dancing around a stripper's pole at 4am and a morning after trying to figure out how to get back into the city on country public transport. January has seen J appear in a different leopard print dress every night, usually in a range of different colours and styles, asking 'Do you think I look slutty enough?' No J, never. Besides you can't look that slutty in rocker black boots and enough eye make-up to cover yourself from head to toe. Right? She essentially told Motley Crue to piss off and has been on a few smoking-and-sex 'non-dates' with vampire. Wow managed to get himself fired as a promoter from the club we always saw him at and has deleted everyone off facebook. J is kind of disappointed. She didn't want to have sex with him again because he had no idea what he was doing but she liked messing with him. J also managed to wake up the day after Australia day tangled up in a VB shirt and her boss's housemate. Not the evercool Bossman, but her new boss who'd invited her and a few others over to her house for a quiet Australia day. All J's other co-workers had left by midnight. And J doesn't even like VB. Or the housemate.

L can't seem to escape the old men. For whatever reason, she has alwyas been the target of the 40+s at her local pub and many of the clubs in the city. Old sleazy men just love her. She went out for a few ciders and a game of pool last week only to have a guy who had to be in his 50s start hitting on her and grabbing her arse while trying to teach her how to play pool. L was pissed off, and even more so at her shitty friends who didn't say anything. H or A would have decked him. K would have got one of the bouncers to get rid of him. This time L had to do her own dirty work. Which involved locking herself in the bathroom swigging Bundy from a plastic cup until he'd gone to pick up someone else.

Druggie seems to have calmed herself down a bit. After getting an official police caution after being caught eith pot, she spent a week cold turkey even from booze. Her boyfriend got pretty pissed off because he was baked and out of it the whole time but at least Druggie wasn't suicidal. She's back smoking weed but hasn't hit the harder stuff again, so we're hoping she stays as clean as she can.

There's been a couple of music festivals which, as always, involve ripping off other people's hats, drinking water from a security guy's hose and screaming 'Bitch those are my sunglasses' upon realising your long lost RayBans are shielding someone else's eyes. Yeah, we love mosh pits. And dirty, grungy guys with long hair and ripped band t-shirts.

Yeah, we love summer. Pass us another fishbowl yeah?