Last week she met this guy at a club. Not a guy she'd ever met before, not even a mutual friend. Just some random. They hooked up, fair enough. That's what randoms are for. K, being K, made sure he got her number and got his number and started calling and texting him the second she got away from him. This is her usual strategy. Usually she scares guys off by being too clingy and intense straight away. But apparently this guy was really desperate to get laid. In the past week they've been on two dates. One trip to the movies and one afternoon spent at his house (at the very last stop on the train line-it should serve as a warning to all city folk such as us that no one cool lives at the end of the train line) without sex because he was apparently 'too big'. That could potentially mean he thinks he's top shit and she's not putting out yet, but that's the excuse they're using.
This went on for a week. She didn't tell anyone about him. Not even B, her twin sister and flatmate. Not even J, who she tells everything. Then all of a sudden a post pops up on facebook. 'K is now in a relationship with end-of-the-train-line.' Everyone was pretty much like 'wait-what?!' No one is in a relationship on facebook without everyone already knowing. It's just a confirmation of what everyone has known for months but it's about time it's made facebook-official. Even B and R were never actually a couple on facebook, and they were talking about getting married. They lived together. Of course, look where that ended up...Still, facebook should not be where you announce your relationship/engagment/pregnancy/whatever. It's just where you confirm it. Clearly, K doesn't get this.
There is no logical reason why K didn't tell anyone about her new boyfriend but then, since when is K logical? And end-of-the-train-line isn't exactly the world's greatest catch. He's short and kinda odd looking. He's into drugs and smoking (which, ironically K hates). But perhaps most importantly, he's kinda an arsehole.
On their second date he informed K he expected her to sleep with him within a month or he would dump her. This is the kind of thing you just don't say to girls, even if you're thinking it. He does get points for being honest but it still makes him a jerk. He also told K he had trust issues, in that he can't trust girls until he's slept with them. That's obviously just a ploy to get her into bed.
The scary thing is, K doesn't have trust issues. She'll just trust anyone straight away. K is in love with the idea of love. She wants a boyfriend so badly and she moves at warp speed throughout her relationships. She tells guys she loves them after 2 weeks. She expects monogamy after the first date. She expects a marriage proposal after sex, which is probably why she's never actually had sex, despite being happy about getting felt up by five different guys in a night. K is also convicinced that end-of-the-train-line is a great guy even though the signs point to him being a wanker who just wants to get into her pants. He is not a nice guy. He is arrogant and breaks the law and doesn't appear to have any ambition in life. He is certainly not 'the one'. He doesn't love her. They have nothing in common. Literally. They don't share a taste in music, an outlook on life, any friends, any values or even a suburb. But she could fall in love with him and he will break her heart. You need distance at the beginning of a relationship. You need...sanity.
Good luck, K.
In other news, J and B are in a bitchfight. During pizza and beer last night an annoying guy started hitting on B. Because she likes to try and make R jealous, she texted him about said guy being really full-on and what should she do about it. He replyed back 'just get J to deal with it. she'll know what to do, she's a slut'. B didn't actually tell J about said text, just pretended it didn't happen. Later, when J was using B's phone to call someone she found the text and was pissed off.
Where does R get off? He hardly knows J and her sex life is none of his buisness! Let's face it. When you reach a certain age and you like sex but you don't have a stable significant other, you rack up partners. You have one-night-stands. As long as you're comfortable and happy about your choices no one else should judge you for it. Just because was with a girl from the age of 16 to 23 and then was with B and never had a chance with anyone else doesn't mean his is the only way to live or even the right way. It's simply his way. It's easy to hate people who get up on their high horse and judge people just because they aren't the same. Being single is a perfectly acceptable way to live. Not all of us want the white picket fence and the dozen kids and to be with the same person our entire lives.
That's what this blog is about. Being young and being free and drinking and fucking up and partying and having a good time and not settling and not being tied down.
But the worst thing is that B didn't even try to defend J. She said nothing to R then, and she's still said nothing to R. She told J she didn't think she was a slut and R was a tool but that's it. By not telling R off she's condoning his behaviour. She's agreeing with it. It shouldn't even be a question. It shouldn't be something you have to think about. It's reflex. It's 'no, she's not a slut (or whatever it happens to be: bitch/nerd/ugly etc) she's a fucking awesome person and you're an arsehole'. But B will never tell R off. So J won't speak to her. And when the choice is between J and R, B will always choose R. It's been months and she still can't get over him. He's all she talks about and thinks about. Seriously, move on.
Good luck, B.